FUEL IS FUEL NO MATTER THE GENDER
If you were/are in a relationship with a narc and can’t understand why they’re constantly flirting with members of the same sex. It’s because all women and men are viewed as a potential fuel source victims/targets. The narc may also be gender fluid, which means the narc doesn’t identify male or female. This gender fluidity makes it convenient for them to take fuel from whomever they can–without shame, guilt or dealing with the confusing consequences it creates for their spouses or partners.”
The Non-Binary Abuser
The term non-binary means a man or woman does not identify as being attracted to sexually to a specific gender. Many extreme narcissists on the spectrum can fall into this category. An extreme narcissist is entitled to do, think, feel or say whatever he pleases. The world is simply here to cater to his every whim and desire. Outwardly the narc may say and express gender identity (often heterosexuality), but it is a ruse to conceal the true sexuality of the narcissist. Being gender fluid means more human flesh the narc can consume over a lifetime. Each victim is another notch on a belt of delicious conquests. Each holds a special a mental and physical portion the narcissist consumes again-and-again for years to come in that twisted and toxic mind.
The World is Their Buffet
I’ve written in the past how sex is the ultimate source of fuel and gives the narc the perfect setup to get either positive or negative supply. When given the chance, a narc will seduce any given number of people, of any sex, race or culture to ensure a constant supply of positive or negative praise they must devour from people.
They don’t care about “whom” they are sleeping with (most relationships will involve a sexual encounter at some point) as much as when they can get their fix. I’ve even read studies the narcissist may not even climax, nor is that their aim. Instead, the sexual act is about the narcissist being in full power and control. Yes you read that correctly. The narc gets a bigger thrill from the power trip than the orgasm created by the sexual act itself!
Non-Stop Feedback is as Essential as Breathing
A true narcissist needs a constant flow of positive or negative praise to function. Ignoring a narcissist is pure death in its most evil form. They must constantly be the center of someone’s world or tearing someone’s world apart. It is as essential to their existence as breathing. This need for continuous acknowledgement and attention is what is referred to as narcissistic fuel supply. Taking positive/negative feedback is like a drug addict needing another hit. They simply can’t function or live without it.
You Are Meat to the Narc
To become fuel means the human form is nothing more than something to be used and consumed. The narcissist slyly traverses his relationship with his spouse or long-term partner by keeping them off the trail through a web of elaborate lies. The primary partner is mostly a cover for the truly vile activities the narcissist is up to. While deceiving a primary partner and outwardly appearing to be a fine husband (or wife), the narcissist is carrying on with a number of lovers or fan club of both sexes on the side. All while lapping the the pleasure it gives him to be so clever in deceiving the kind person he’s married to or in a committed relationship. He also enjoys and takes satisfaction in having his other lovers clamoring for his sexual attention. He may even go as far as to triangulate them in public to make them openly compete for his affection.
No matter your status in the relationship with the narcissist, all lovers are nothing more than a meal. A piece of meat on platter to the narc. The narc feels nothing and cares nothing for anyone. Love is a display of weakness. Compassion is for the simple minded. To manipulate, control, conquer, intellectually outwit and callously play with multiple human puppets–is a genius only an experienced extreme narcissist can accomplish. The narc’s only thought and focus is where and by whom the fuel need will be met.
If leaving your narcissist is something you can’t do or aren’t ready to do now, you need to know the narcissist’s sexual deviance is a large risk to your health. I would recommend taking precautions to protect yourself immediately. Narcs are not known for having protected sex because it reduces their own sexual pleasure or is an awkward interruption to their bedroom performance. Research has also shown they are not compelled to have protected sex even if they are sexually involved with multiple partners.
Whomever the narcissist is having sex with, you are having sex with too. Refuse to be intimate unless he wears a condom and only have protected sex if you suspect your narcissist is having sexual affairs outside your relationship. I also recommend regularly testing for a full panel of sexually transmitted diseases. Many former spouses and long-term victims have been given HPV, vaginal infections, or worse! Get tested if you’re unsure (see links below in the US).